Sun 11 May 2008
i brake for ducks
Posted by Compulsive Writer under domestic bliss , thank my lucky stars[4] Comments
Did I tell you about the ducks that have moved in across the street? There is a male and a female I believe. Occasionally, they wander over to my yard, where they are most welcome. My kids even set up the “pool” end of the slip-n-slide in our backyard in hopes the ducks would find that inviting. I think the ducks came for the water feature in my neighbor’s backyard. Incidentally, he is the city water director, so I find it perfectly reasonable that he is hosting a pair ducks.
And yes, it’s Mother’s Day today. And a perfectly good time for a little state of the nest address, don’t you think?
My ducks are not all lined up in a row, but I love them anyway. I enjoy these ages and stages–nearly 9 to almost 19. While I still cook and clean and sometimes play homework police, the kids are perfectly capable of accomplishing those tasks (after a fashion) on their own, so my job is mostly about showing up for them. Cheering them on. Supporting them. And still working on cramming a few more words of wisdom and life’s lessons down their throats before they leave me (at which point it will be my job to sit back and love them and pray like crazy for them as they find their own ways in the world. I do not intend on telling them what to do at that point, unless they ask. And even then, maybe not).
My oldest bird is readying himself to leave the nest and I’m trying to adjust to that idea and prepare myself for the changes that lie ahead. But I’m busy enough I think I can, on most days, distract myself with the here and now in hopes the time he is gone will fly by quickly. That does not mean I won’t miss him. It just means I am preparing myself to survive his being gone.
In spite of having just arrived at that part of the book in Freakonomics where I learn that according to statistics, my work as a mother doesn’t matter (yeah, right!), I’m still trying to be aware of what I can do better and take steps in that direction every day. I’m also trying to feel sure in what parts I get right so I don’t beat myself up too badly. Some days are better than others, but I’m trying to do my best and praying hard that God will make up the difference.
My kids are good kids. Even the ones who struggle. I enjoy observing them, discovering new things about the way they think and the way they see the world. I love that each one of them knows how to be kind and be a good friend. I just love being their mother–being invited along for the ride during this part of their lives.
So now, despite the fact they did not clean up the downstairs yesterday as asked, I’m going to go make crepes for breakfast. It’s their favorite. Doing this for them on Mother’s Day reminds me to be less selfish and helps me remember to be grateful for my blessings–in whatever form they come to me.
Happy Mother’s Day!


